Sometimes a hashtag comes along that is too irresistible not to follow deep down into the rabbit hole.
One such hashtag lately is “#shitmykidsays.” First of all, it’s very name implies that hilarity is guaranteed. Second of all, reading these tweets from parents all over the world is the best way to spend your time.
We often underestimate the sarcasm and whit that children possess but I guarantee after you see what these parents deal with on a daily basis you will never again think twice about whether or not children of all ages are capable of being hilarious… because they are obviously hilarious (intentionally or not!)
1. Asking the important questions!
Who says kids don’t learn the right things at school?
3. Shot down, hard.
No thanks, mom.
4. A for Effort
F for Fart.
5. No offense…
To who really matters.
6. Here’s a little something extra!
Life lessons important to teach our kids young: wash your hands.
7. Nobody appreciates your talent around here
Least of all, your children.
8. And mothers everywhere glanced at dads.
(And probably glared.)
9. This kid is going places.
Possibly dark places, possibly nerdy places. Definitely places.
10. Impressive string of words from a 3-year-old.
Sorry mum, you may have birthed this child but they are a strong, independent toddler, and they don’t need you.
11. Same difference.
Kids raise good points.
13. Big numbers are big!
And sometimes dogs are brown.
14. Your child does not approve of your life choices.
But this is pretty funny.
An epic burn stings a little extra when it comes from a 9-year-old.
16. How do you answer such a question?
Most of us would say, “yes.”
Preschool or kindergarten is when things change.
Which one are you?
19. Oh dear.
Not a very optimistic kiddo, eh?
20. Lessons from children!
Keep that in mind for next time, dad.
21. Dramatic kids are the best!
You’ll always get a good laugh with them.
Someone’s been talking to his friends with divorced parents.
23. Too bad, so sad.
I’ve got plenty.
24. I’m sorry but…
Every good apology includes a “but.”
25. I have so many questions.
I need the backstory to this tweet.
26. Well, he’s not wrong.
I mean he is wrong but don’t you kind of wish he wasn’t?
Do you wonder where he heard this first?
28. I like the way this kid thinks.
I don’t want to see their bill from the plumber, though.
29. “I know.”
Words that sting.
30. Have all your questions been answered?
Because mommy can’t take anymore.
31. Kids keep things interesting!
I’m dying to know where the wrong place is.
32. A pair of troublemakers.
Well, one has solutions…